Falling All Over Again

Just got back from Portland, Oregon last night.  It has me wondering about what makes someplace home.  How did I fall in love with this city at first sight, when I knew nothing about her?  How did I just instantly know I would end up there one day when I first drove into the city one cold night in 2003?  It feels at times she loves me nearly as much as I love her.  Did she align the stars to bring us together?  Granted it was not an easy road to get me there and keep me there for over 4 years, but worth every step.

When I returned to my hometown in California last year brokenhearted after one of the biggest losses of my life, I truly believed I'd never go back.  It seemed Portland was closed to me, she no longer called me the way she used to.  I thought she too was through with me, perhaps all our bridges were burned.  It took me a while, but I was coming to terms with that.

Then I drove into the city one dark cold night last week and there she was sparkling under a pink cloudy sky and it took my breath away.  I fell head over heels all over again and in the blink of an eye I was fantasizing about drinking coffee while watching the rain fall and taking long walks on cool foggy mornings and the smell of the northwest soil as I planted a garden.  She was calling me home again.

Now I am back in California again.  The weather is fantastic, Fall it seems is on hold for a while longer.  My life is here.  My parents, my job, my best friend, my history is here.  Am I ready to pack up all my sundresses and trade them in for endless seasons of boots and scarves?

I don't have any answers tonight.  I am torn between so many choices and the lives they could lead me to.

Inspiration Strikes or Will be Striking (Soon I Hope)

A lot of time has passed since my last post and I don't want to go into all the mundane changes that has taken places, but a quick wrap up is due.  My job has been in limbo for a few months nearly lost it and now I'm actually working more than ever, not even sure how that happened.  My Etsy shop is on hiatus, due to the job situation, the lack of studio space, and most unfortunately it seems the muses have abandoned me for the moment.  Although, I have an inkling they may be returning soon, that tingling frantic solitary kind of energy that accompanies them seems to be haunting me again.  I have moved living situations twice now,both have been great, but my current one is giving me lots of time to think and ponder, which is perhaps why the muses are returning, who knows, the muses can never be fully understood.

Anyway, life is good.  Quiet, verging on silent, but good.  Although, the quiet is going to be short lived I fear.  This next few months is going to be busy.  I am heading to Portland this week with my Mama to see my sisters and my wonderful girlfriends.  At the end of the month, I am heading down south to Newport to visit my beautiful cousin for All Hallows Eve, my very favorite holiday.  The in November I am going on vacation to Maui.  I'm a lucky girl, and I'm going to work on being a productive girl to and get back to work on some projects I've forsaken.  

*Picture courtesy of www.Milliande.com